Coming soon! (And you may be sorry)
The Happy Chip!
The latest wonder of nanoengineering from the folks at NeoHappy, Inc.!
Your Happy Chip™ can measure in real-time your own hormone levels and vital signs, to enable you to scientifically determine your own satisfaction from moment to moment.
Once you receive our revolutionary nanochip in one easy, comfortable implantation procedure, just install our Happy App™ on your smartphone to guide yourself to the most pleasurable choices, from new favorite foods, to the most satisfying personal relationships.
Hundreds of millions of people already enjoy the benefits of the Happy Chip™, as you can see from their testimonials on our web site, NeoHappy.me. Also gratifying, your preference data will contribute to the global Happy Ratings™ service, with your privacy guaranteed. So, you'll help people just like you to more informed life choices.
(Side effects may include mild irritation at injection site; hormone-induced suicidal depression, hypermanic episodes, uncontrollable libido, and/or murderous rage; remote-controlled death; and ultimately global subjugation.)
NeoHappy, Inc.
Knowledge for the Best Life You Can Live
